Monthly Archives: May 2014

I am Nathan …. and I am not a lightworker !

I have crossed the beyond the threshold of death on four major occasions . And I am not sure you are going to like what I saw ?

Can it be that our obsession with light and dark is destroying this world . Do you really have to pick a side ?

The following piece is likely to upset some people so I am warning you before you continue reading . All I offer you is what I have personally seen and experienced with my own perception and consciousness . Although I have had many interesting experiences and interactions with what I call beyond physical reality . I have four times in my life gone completely behind the veil of life . I have at various stages of my life had the mind blowing and terrifying experiencing of completely ripping back the curtain of reality … experiencing death and living to tell the tale . Each time I saw the same thing yet it was shown to me in a different way .

Each time I crossed over I used a different doorway . Among them was one incredible consciously induced out of body experience as a teenager. The second was through smoking DMT . The third one was through the use of sacred medicine in a healing circle particularly Ayahuasca . And the fourth and most recent one was last night when my guides ( a higher aspect of myself that I perceive more clearly all the time ) took me on a beautiful journey in answer to a question I had , a question about a piece of information that I had channeled through them the day before . I leave you to morally debate the doorways I have used as my gift to you and your ever evolving perspectives . I leave my self open to you with no fear of the views and opinions you will cast .

I was a little confused by the information but I realized that this was the fourth time I had been shown this and I decided I had to share .. where I had avoided this before because of the way people reacted to what I suggested many years ago . I once tried to share the following perceptions and I was shunned by friends and family alike … and amazingly the ones that called themselves deeply evolved and awake shunned me with the most passion . Yet here I am passing on this message yet again ! Please understand .. It is just my personal perceptions !

Shakespeare himself was a esoteric mind of note . One thing that is conveniently left out of the history books is his deeply spiritual understanding of the fabric that runs through all of reality !

All of life is a stage ……….


This is all very well, its a beautiful analogy that can just be taken on face value . I ask you tho just how deep does it go ?
Does it merely mean that we wear masks in our everyday lives in this one great play ?
Does it in actual fact mean that we are cast in more than one roll and in more than one play over time ?
Could one push it as far as to say that all of life …… all characters , good and bad (Dark and light) are cut and cast from the same production team . Can it be possible that all the characters that we have demonized or glorified are actually all dressing from the same room behind the scenes ?

At the absolute core of our culture , from our bedtime stories to our ancient teachings and religions passed down, lies this epic depiction of the struggle between light and dark !


There is no doubt that we live in a dualistic reality … one in which these two forces tear at and sculpt and mold us all . At our fundamental level , no matter which side of the socially perceived fence of morality we eventually fall . What we all share in common is that the forge that literally tempers and forms each soul on this planet is the exact same process . This epic , gigantic struggle between light and dark .
We are taught from the moment we open our eyes that it is one or the other . That we must split ourselves apart and choose . We need to pick a side … even our loving grandmothers would gently help in teaching us this… and the naturally the guilt trip that goes with it is never far behind !


What if we are wrong ? What if this schism , this traumatic split that we try and administer through mental and psychic surgery our whole lives is the reason we are so sick ?
Besides money ? The only other core belief that culture is molded upon is the dualistic splitting . The war between heaven and hell . Many of us already know how well the money thing is going …… Many of us already know that it has to go . What if we are wrong about both ?

At this stage I realize that many peoples conscious minds are reeling with frustrated thoughts like . Surely this asshole is not suggesting that we just except the evil if this world ? To rattle your cage a little more I am going to say that I am !

I know at this stage that your mind is reeling at how nonchalant this opinion seems so far . Almost like a fence sitting useless approach that makes you deeply uncomfortable at your core . In actual fact if most of us are honest we realize that it even angers us . Who are we even without this war of sides you might feel !

I implore you to stay with me here gentle souls

One thing my guide always says to me …. Is that ignored children scream the loudest !!

I never truly embraced this statement until this year when I begun to realize the full enormity of this statement . And like with Shakespears admittedly more poetic analogies .It has taken on a whole new life in my mind !

What If I suggested to you that the being or force that you like to call God is made up of all things . He is the perfect balance of all that there is . Dark and light are merely two of those forces . Two forces , that like two beautiful threads that unravel from the same garment . Two beautiful threads light and dark that unravel and dance for eons with each other on this stage . They however are from the same garment . The same production team ….. They my friends from my experience have the same director .
These two threads eventually . Like what is happening now on this great planet start coming coming back together eventually . And in a magical artist inspiration these two threads start to come back together and begin to weave one garment . In a stunning twist of the cosmic imagination we see that these two great seemingly opposing forces have inspired greatness in each other . And when they return and blend together yet again they create something even more magnificent !

And in a perfect dance they neutralize one another . Far greater and far more diverse in experience in understanding they become one yet again . Having grown through dance and interaction with one another . Truly understanding its own nature through the dance with itself . Self actualizing through self experience

This prime creating force .. this source of all life is neither good nor bad . It is an eternal sacred neutral energy just like this beautiful planet beneath our feet . Free of opinion and sides . They lovingly allow all to outplay , gently ebbing us internally to one day self realise what we are in our majesty .
Now at this stage I know that you are very likely spitting through the teeth at what I am suggesting .

Firstly I do not use the term God .. although that would be correct . Simply because semantically the word God had gained a deeply monotheistic momentum . The idea that God is somewhere out there watching , deciding, judging like stern parent. Which is deeply unhealthy in its own right !

The force I speak of is running through your heart right now . Is behind your eyes as we speak . Its the architect , the painter , the inventor . This prime creating source is the river of life that moves through all things . The ones that can be felt behind slow deep breath .

It is all things … no one label will ever stick . Any label or box you try and give it comes from within the construct of the reality of that which it creates for you to perceive it in . In other words it has created all things .

In another deeply dangerous monotheistic belief that has spread like wildfire and is tearing us further apart is that fact that you think God is separate to you . You are within the mind and heart of God as we speak . You are within the body and stream of his consciousness. And therefore many enlightened souls that were either glorified or demonized depending on the ruling parties at the time . You are God , you are the son of God . You are the divine .

Unfortunately even tho a cell in your liver is a part of your body this fact does not guarantee that it even knows it is part of a greater system . In actual fact a very clever liver cell might even hear whispered stories of this great being…. This human that makes decisions for it … glorifying it in stories and fable , never quite realizing that the thing it calls to when it closes its eyes . The things it longs to be a part of …. Is in actual fact what it already is .

This beautiful understanding . Allows the liver cell to experience something we have all forgotten . An ability that we all carry within us .. as we are God !

The ability to experience the cell as well as the whole being . The ability to play the role in the play while realizing that you are both the stage , the director .. that you are even the other parts in the play .

This liberating fact will make you experience life that will never ever be lonely or scary again . You can choose to be in the game or you can choose to be the gamer . And in reality you are both .


Now back to this rather upsetting conversation for most people . When all of these forces are aligned . This Prime creating force .. the source of all life that runs through the basement and fabric of all realities seen and unseen. They neutralize each other .
Source energy is neither good nor bad . Yet it is incorrect to say that source energy sometimes is evil and sometimes is good . It would be more correct to say that the true eternal God behind all things is a perfect potential energy neutral and sacred in ways we cannot comprehend .

Even good and bad …… I now see as energies that are disconnected or connected to the river of life . Even our own lives have shown us that been disconnected from the light within us is not always a bad thing, it often makes our return to the inner connection so beautifully . Almost as tho we only understand the connection because we have tried to live without it

It is only when this God force , this river of life runs through us that it is cast into different roles . The threads are slowly unwound . By the time the characters hit the stage . It truly seems that there are opposing sides . And through this amazing dance we all grow . We all learn . It is our God given right to choose as many roles as we so please , and to play on any side . We are God and we give ourselves that right .

All the pieces at the end of the day go back in the same box . You can choose white or black as many times as you want . When you are done playing you will realize you are in actual fact the chessboard and not one of the teams . You are part of the greatest game ever played working out more variations on the game of life that we can conceive in our 3D human mind . Luckily we also have the mind of god within us .. and this shows us a whole new picture if we can relinquish our hold on what we think is our identity just for a moment .

Just to try and rattle you a little more .If I told you that the theme for this galaxy is this this struggle between these two forces ….. that wouldn’t surprise you . What if I told you that these two forces don’t even exist in some dimensions . What if I told you that there are so many expressions ,what I call platform themes within the mind of god that your head would spin . There are entire dimensions where light and dark are merely one neutral force ….. always in balance and therefor never acting out in either direction . There are some dimensions that have many other themes outplaying . And even more bizarre if I told you that every single schoolroom and dimension already has a part of you in it … learning . You are the liver cell , as well as a heart cell , as well as the lungs . Essentially when you are done splitting hairs and experiencing each and every aspect of your true nature , You can just choose to be God once again ……. And a sweet return to home it always is
It certainly was for me

So lets get back on track here . Lets just talk about this dimension and the theme that is outplaying here . There is no doubt that the balance has been lost between these two light and dark threads that are interwoven into the fabric of our society . And like all great biospheres this one is already balancing itself out .

I would like to suggest to you that this great force behind all things ….. yes I am talking about you

And we are going to try and do something on earth that has never been done here before .

I would like to suggest that we want to try something that has never ever been tried ….. And truly that is what we are all about . fearless exploration and perfect freedom of choice as to which part we wish to experience … the role we wish to outplay

What if i suggested to you that we want to end the game without putting their pieces back in the box . We want to wake everyone up without taking their bodies away . Imagine suddenly been woken up in the middle of a passionate scene you are acting out , in a role that you know so well . Only to realize that it it is a play

What I am suggesting is very scary for some people . I am suggesting that in the past . The prime creating force .. or us, would put ourselves back in the box . We would go home for healing and rest and then once again we would cast another great play , another great story . We are trying something really exciting now . We truly are a magnificent storyteller are we not . What happens if in the middle of the Earth amnesia game we wake everybody up …. hmmmmm how exciting !

At this stage you are either fearless trying to humor me or you are already off sending me your mail of hate regarding my blasphemous suggestions ( I get more than you would think )

Is it so hard to realize that you have been playing both sides of the fence .

Even in the lifetime . Can you not see how you have been the protagonist as well as the antagonist . To some in this lifetime you have been the hero and the saint . To others you have been the enemy and the catalyst for change . No person on this planet is not playing a multitude of roles on both sides of the fence …. this is a lie that is perpetuated in your society .

Think about it on a personal level . I am, assuming you believe yourself to be a good person ( we all do because we are to afraid not to )

Let me ask you . Does everyone like you ?

Have you been the hero and the villain ?
Have you not fixed and broken hearts ?
Have you in this time only not been the darkness and the light ?

And if you have the courage to realize that you yourself have this great dance going on inside you … then why is it so hard to believe that this is outplaying on a grander scale though you .

That this in actual fact outplay on more lifetimes , realities and time timelines than only the liver cell can comprehend .

Now lets look at why this has made most people so angry . What I am suggesting at the end of the day is that you need to stop picking sides , You need to stop tearing yourself apart . To be one .. you need both threads . That is the secret blasphemous key to this reality .

In some ways your darkest hours where your finest moments .. they showed you where you didn’t want to be . They showed you what you were not ! You reached enlightenment through you dance !

You my friends have to embrace your dark side ……. Now hang on , not in the way that you are thinking . Open your heart and stick with me here . You are the liver cell and the God . Think and feel with both now !

If you ignore part of yourself . If you deny that it exist … you are unbalanced . The ignored children within you scream so loud that eventually midst guilt and torturous living one of them tears you apart .

All the great characters in our history where plagued by the counter energy that they were denying .

Now the moral part of you is thinking , how can you embrace the darkness within you asshole ? Are you suggesting that I just do whatever I want ……. That to is a choice, I would answer !

What I am suggesting is that when you are ready to return to oneness you will embrace all your children within you . You will reunite the multidimensional and often fractured soul that exist in the universe within you . When all these parts become one again . They neutralize each other . They become one perfectly balanced neutral being .
All that is left is perfect balance and acceptance … what I understand to be true love !

When you reunite the clans within you .. the war dies down. Peace and harmony will be your . You will not be on either side of any war . You will hold the understanding and opinions of every part of your body . Not just the liver cell and its limited opinions of the rotten smelling intestines below it . You will not judge the intestine without understanding how it helps remove the filth from the system .. how the intestine excretes a mass of shit that goes on to fertilize new plants !

You will be as one . And when you see how all systems are run as one perfect self actualizing and growing artist . Only unconditional love and acceptance for all things can be felt . You are once again experiencing God as a whole .

There is no doubt a wall that separates the life of form and the the source that runs through the wall . We all all on the same side of the wall sticking our arms through wholes in the wall into gloves . Into bodies . As we place our hand through the whole in the wall we can experience first hand and interact with the reality on the other side of the wall . We have these beautiful gloves that we live in . Sadly we often forget that we are not the glove , we are the hand in the glove . And as different as all these gloves may seem they all come from the same side of the wall .
There are many themes outplaying in many realities . Yet we consider ourselves to be only right here and now

There is no doubt that the dance between the dark and light is an epic one . Its is a theme that has inspire and age in time and space . Many of us as bruised battered and scarred , some of us are really angry . Many of us are still walking around pointing fingers and shouting .

Open your eyes my child . Open your eyes no matter where you stand and what side of the game you think you are on . You are playing a role . And you where beyond magnificent . You played your part to perfection . And when you begin to see how we have grown and evolved through what we have learnt you will forever hold the pride in the part you played in this great tapestry .

It is time to put your finger down now . Its is time to stop splitting yourself asunder . It is time to invite all the pars of you home . It is time to call them all home when deep in meditation . When you are breathing quietly in the heart of god …. step out of the liver cell and thank all the organs for the part they have played in your great adventure
Invite each part of you home . The reason you are sick my friend is not because you need the light ,. You are sick because you will out lovingly accept and bring home the parts of yourself you have cast and judged . You need to bring all your lost and scared and judged children home for reintegration and transmutation back into the perfectly balanced manifold of your soul

Do you not see that when the child it is not ignored it will no longer scream and act out . The child once back in your bosom will sleep and be at peace once more .
You will neither be good nor bad .
You will live in perfect harmony with all things . Unconditional love will flow from you as you have balance within . You can never judge as all those things you see around you . Are within you … but stepping now in perfect balance and harmony . In the universal manager of unconditional source love .

You my friend are potential energy .

You will also have an incredible gentle love and acceptance for those around you that still dance and struggle with parts that they do not realize are of themselves . Those that choose to wrestle on with there own serpents that rise from within ….. =Give them that choice .

Be loving enough to allow them the honor of becoming self realized in there own way .

Truth I am sure your heart has shown you … is merely a juxtaposition to the role that you are currently playing . Only the liver cell can truly hold a doctrine or truth . Only the liver cell can have a boxed perspective of what should and should not be .

The only truth that can be held at a core source energy is perfect unconditional acceptance and love for all that outplayed within it .

All is choice
All is allowed
All can come home or experience home within themselves at any time .

We my friends are all one ….. not just the good or the bad guys

Its time to end the war . Its time to put your truth swords and doctrines and judgement down . All we need to realize is that we are all one . We are all the same being perceiving ourselves through a myriad of different perspectives … and truly we are magnificent . And truly we could never ever be bored !

We have so many more dreams to dream , pictures to paint and worlds to create . The potential beauty within us is beyond understanding

You are fucking magnificent ,are you not my war torn friends ?

Behind your eyes is a beauty I want to reach out and touch

Time to stop picking sides . Your opinions and judgement surgically remove you from the psyche of the source . The cut you free from the body !

Oh gentle brother I implore you put your finger down

As you stand now fully balanced .. calm and free of the storm that you carried for so long . You will silently and gently allow others to outplay there last scenes as they see fit . All is allowed .. all will lead us back to the same conclusion….. When the curtain drops we will all bow together .

And we were magnificent once again !

This part of me is Nathan Raaths . I am not a being of light or dark . I am not a light worker or a dark worker . I have played all these roles .

I have been the hero , I have been the enemy .

I have had betrayal on my lips and I have spoken pure healing .

I have brought souls to their knees and I have lifted them to the skies .

With each role I understood more and more that which I truly am

I am all things ….. and in this perfect dance , we forever grow !

I am no longer afraid . I am peaceful , I am calm . All my children lie within my breast . All I feel is love and acceptance . I have no opinion of your process , just like I was left to explore the way I saw fit .. I leave you with this same respect !

I have not truth for you other that the truth that will lead you to find your own

And when you ask me what I am to you
I will merely reply you are another part of me .
You are me perceiving myself through from another perspective

We are one ….. We are God

We no longer bound by one juxtaposition .
We exist within all angles ….where they become angels !

With perfect love in my heart I am still saying my lines and doing my dance . I still playing my part in this tired scene !

More and more of us are acting out on a stage that we  an see right through

This love and understand will spread more each day
And it will not rip us apart .. it will return us to oneness . And no one gets left behind !

So for the third time in this life I will denounce myself as a lightworker.. and I am sure that it will be met with equal disgust and disdain !

I am a a sacred neutral being . Just like you .. just like the earth beneath my feet !
I am here to help the two threads wind back together . So that love can be the only thing left … Love !

Perfect acceptance of the last few old scenes will be the super power of each awakened soul !

I love you just the way you are

My message you is that the answer is never to separate and divide anything … it is always to bring it back together in oneness .

And when you feel the same about yourself …. each child will slowly dissolve their role and influence and slowly become one .

All you children will be back in the bosom of God , silently sleeping …. no longer looking for attention on the game you once thought was your life !

We are one

Nathan Raaths and the God in me … the God in you !