Ego, Art and Birth

I like to refer to the ego as ‘earthbound awareness’ as the term ‘ego’ has been tainted into symbolizing an aspect of the human being that is all bad and a part of ourselves we should not associate with. Nothing is all good or all bad, everything serves a purpose. The truth is that the ego IS the human being. We cannot disassociate ourselves from it. It is what tethers our soul, or eternal aspect, to this reality.

The ego, or earthbound awareness, is a necessary and unavoidable aspect of living inside of this world. Our earthbound awareness is only concerned with things that this physical reality is built on and thrives on. These are things such as fear, hierarchy, sustenance, possessions, survival (both physically and emotionally) and the list can extend further. But the primary aspect of earthbound awareness is fear. Since the physical body can die and the physical body is the ego, it is designed to fight, protect and survive. Our ego, or earthbound awareness, is our armour.

In ancient times earthbound awareness would keep us alive in terms of alerting us to dangers which in those days were wild animals and rival tribes. Then earthbound awareness had to develop further as time went by to protect us from religion and world governments who tortured and murdered people for not being obedient slaves in a societal structure that condemned free or individual thinking. As time went by your survival depended less on whether or not you were holding a sword or rifle and became more about how well you could fit in with the masses and be an obedient member of society. The ego, or earthbound awareness, developed and advanced itself to match this ‘programme’ in an attempt to survive. Think of it like a master computer, reality is a programme and as programmes advance so too does the operating system (the ego) need to be upgraded.

And so our egos upgraded from a level of using weapons and combat to survive to using all kinds of intricate emotional manipulation, narrative building and facade mastery.

Some people have become so masterful at these survival tactics that no one ever comes close to finding out who they really are inside, not even themselves. Some people have mastered these new upgrades to the human ego so competently that they have actually completely lost themselves in the physical world and the world of ego and are literally just managing the intricacies of their facades and narratives with no time for anything else outside of that.

There are masterful mask wearers in this world that are so good at the game they play that they don’t even realize they are playing the game anymore. The facade they hide behind becomes everything for them. Their egos have convinced them that the facade is the only thing keeping them alive and that without it they have nothing, not even a life. Their lives are built upon their facades and they will play any card at any price to protect that facade. They identify with the facade, or persona, as if it were the true and only identity.

In this reality today we find ourselves in a game of egos primarily designed for the purpose of survival. Intrinsically we still fear being seen. Being seen by the hungry lion or by the rival warrior or by the guards or by the clergymen or by the inquisitor or by the Gestapo or by, at this point, pretty much anyone… the ego does not know who to trust!

But wait a minute. Is there still a need for such a fear? Is there a need for this fear to be present in our current time space experience? Is it still possible for me to be burned at the stake for talking about energy and having crystals? Is the ego construct that we carry today relevant to our current experience?

The truth is that the ego is based on self-consciousness and we are moving into a new paradigm of universal-consciousness. There is no need to carry the same fears that we had before. There is no need to hide away and play the same games as before. There is no need to pretend to be lesser than or unimportant or to indulge in self-degradation to survive. Conversely there is also no need to indulge in self-elevation and pretence.

This is a time that is calling for truth, for honesty, for integrity, for rawness, for vulnerability, a time to shed all the illusions.

There is no longer a need to carry fear in order to survive, but rather there is a deeper and more meaningful existence in transcending the very core of the fear itself.

Our hearts are singing our souls home. Our true beings are being called to crash into us like the comet that wiped out the dinosaurs, so as to end the evolution and reign of the ego, to press ‘reset’.

Enough with the armour and the weaponry, lay them down… Lay down your judgements and your anger and your hatred and your avoidance of self and your unhealthy addictions and your predetermined notions of how everyone and everything should be and your condescension and your pretentiousness and your attachments and your superiority complex or your inferiority complex and your labels and boxes and rules and restrictions on freedom.

It is time for the removal of the layers that are not of true self but rather were constructed by the ego in its desperate attempt to preserve its very own essence, that essence being fear. To the ego fear is survival, without it you will surely die.

But deep down we know this is not true.

I like to think of this world as an intricate art gallery and we are all artists, and our energy is our art.

Life has dropped us into an already painted canvas and we are immediately surrounded by colours that speak and tell us that we are blue or red or grey or whatever colour they decide makes us fit in.

But we are not blue or red or grey or any other mediocre colour they want us to be.

We are something so electrifyingly unique and magical that we actually turn this painting of dull grey conformity into a raging storm of colourful passion and depth and actually threaten the equilibrium of this painting we were dropped into. Does this mean we need to dull our colours to fit in? Fit into what? An already full canvas of illusion and mediocrity?
Or are we here to realize that there is no one canvas to fit into… That there is no prescribed colour for each person, that we are here to anchor new colours and birth a new reality where your energy is your art… To fill the world with whatever it is that you bring to the table, without shame, blame or guilt… Without trying to fit in, without hiding, without silencing our voices, or dulling our colours or turning the volume down on the music that seeps from our veins. 
We are all artists, and we are the paint, and we are the canvas.

If I gave you paint right now and asked you to paint something, would you want to paint over someone else’s painting whilst taking great care to compliment what they have already painted even if the image does not resonate with you at all? Or would you insist on having your own clear canvas on which to go wild with your colours and to paint whatever it is that is bursting from your heart and soul?
It is time now to be colourful… Gift this world with the uniqueness of you. If you don’t fit in, good! Stand out… All the best artworks do!

You will rattle some cages of comfortable numbness that others are trapped in but you will equally inspire others to come out and birth their gorgeous, colourful alchemical magic into the world.

The ego is what tethers your soul to this reality and it can never be eradicated completely, but the size it has grown into out of a need to protect you is unnecessary and it can be downsized a thousand fold. Be the real, authentic, unafraid, powerful, bold, vibrant you! Your ego should play the smallest tiniest role in your life.

YOU are the one in control of this reality…. Not the fear and the protection mechanisms that you have become accustomed to.

It is time to birth our souls. Deliver your own soul into this world…. there is no more need for the womb, we have advanced beyond that. This is no premature birth, it is a post-maturation birthing… A birthing that is loooooooong overdue.

Take your first breath, I only in recent years took mine.

Cut the umbilical cord.

Slap your own ass!

Welcome beautiful soul to this reality called Earth!


Michelle Geldenhuys

I am. Is my true bio of course, the one untainted with labels. But enough about me... Michelle L Geldenhuys is a South African writer and author currently living in Cambodia with two books published and available on Amazon. The first is an autobiography called “Evolution of a Battered Mind” and the second is a self-help handbook called “A Guide to Shadow Work”. She has always been deeply interested and inspired in the profoundly intricate matters of healing and integrating the shadow aspects that tend to torment us. She has been studying esoteric philosophies and practices for just over 20 years and has experienced a number of sacred medicine ceremonies as well as worked with alternative remedies and is an advocate for the belief that all that we need is provided by Mother Gaia. She is also dedicated to promoting authenticity and vulnerability. “We are here to remove our masks. The masks our ego’s have hypnotized us into believing we need to wear. The ego is fear based and programmed to survive at all costs, and since the ego knows it is not immortal like its host, it knows that its own demise is something to be avoided entirely. There are two ways the ego dies: When the host dies (and the spirit ascends) and when the host awakens. The ego will fight to prevent these two outcomes at all costs. Many years ago the ego taught us how to wear armour and carry spears to protect ourselves from wild animals and rival tribes... but now humans have evolved and adjusted into a new paradigm and so the ego has evolved too. It has evolved to a point that it now teaches us how to wear masks to survive. The threat morphing from spears and teeth into manipulation and control has caused the ego to become masterful at creating masks. The ego, depending on whether it is fuelled by superiority or inferiority, will either crave control or to be obedient whilst being controlled. And this requires the use of skilfully crafted masks. I am here to inspire the removal of the mask! No more hiding, no more running, no more window dressing! We are here to gift the world with the uniqueness of our being, to remove all the layers of falseness we have been taught to wear to survive. Our voices are our power and our energy is our art.... It is time to paint the world with the colours of YOU!” - Michelle L Geldenhuys